… there is more to the story.
People have said I shouldn't be so negative. They clearly never bothered to get to know me well. After this many years of depression and struggle if I didn't have hope that tomorrow may be better if I can just make it through today.
I don't suffer fools gladly.
When I see old trees being cut down it hurts my heart. When I lived at The Sands there was the forest of Upper Canada College out the window. Just before I moved a chunk had been sold for housing. The pain when they destroyed that area was visceral. I ached for the loss and I ached for the animals that lost their homes.
I've been around too much death. My grandmother who I was very close to at around 8. My 13th birthday watching an accident directly in front of my Pappy's house while we were all sitting on the front step. Terrible crash and the father died. Many, correct that, most all of the guys that I hung around with growing up either killed themselves or were killed in accidents including my brother Christmas '79. Both grandfathers Christmas '76, and '77. The year after starting my business I lost both my parents; Dad in June and Mom in November. After loosing Doug in '79 it had always been just the three of us left. Now it was just me. This isn't a poor me. It's events that impacted me.
For reasons... I'm able to identify where a system doesn't run smoothly. A good skill to have when building an interface for my customers websites. Potentially very annoying if I'm having to interface with another site that didn't consult with someone with this skill-set.
I can multitask like a mad woman but don't expect any focus work to be done at the same time. If I'm doing focus work distractions drive me bonkers. I'm empathetic to a fault and it often affects me far more than I should probably let it. Sounds others can blow off make me nuts. Especially if I'm really low on spoons or under pressure. I'm also considered negative as I can quickly process a suggestion and pick out the flawed logic or potential issues needing to be addressed prior to implementation. If attended to could save loads of time and dollars on projects.
While there are challenges I'd not trade these gifts.